Cleaning Mindfulness for the new moms
I would like to share my personal experience as a new mom. I did not see very small children being brought up from close quarters. So I had a faint idea that child care might be problematic but it was much more than I could ever imagine. My daughter had feeding problems initially. All I could do was to see her cry with bloating. I tried everything – hot compress, herbal remedies, allopathic medicines, but 3 months were complete hell for me and my little princess. Sometimes, I was so depressed that we used to cry together and there used to be no one at home. There were times, when I would keep wiping the floor, keeping washing and drying the clothes, and keep cooking, because I didn’t know what to cook so that my daughter would eat it willingly. My daughter was actually underweight; however, it is a common problem with new moms that they are always anxious about the well-being of their children. The obsession to be a “good mom” and provide the best possible for the baby, is quite prevalent in first-time moms. And I can safely say that this can trigger a deep sense of failure and depression – postpartum depression. Even while writing this, I am filled with a deep sense of regret that my daughter suffered all that in spite of all my efforts. This is good enough to push someone in a bout of depression. Thankfully, I have learned to be mindful about it!
Therefore I personally believe that new moms must equip themselves with mindfulness training with a special focus on cleaning mindfulness because they might find themselves doing that most of the time. It is extremely important to be mindful during the cleaning process – otherwise many such ideas like
I am good enough for doing this only
This is all I have now in my life
I am not able to give enough time to the baby because of the chores
No one cares to help me etc. etc.
– might pop up in the mind and continue to grow. So it is important to be mindful of the passing moment and try not to judge the entire life on the basis of a phase of life. It takes a lot of patience to see the whole picture and most of us might lack that.
Mindful Cleaning for Children
This is the reason mindful cleaning should be taught to children. Mindful children will not fumble for things that should be done. They will not be confused between the right and wrong choices. They will not waste their time on meaningless deviations and save the precious years of their lives.
Mindful cleaning for children must start with decluttering. Every child should be taught to decide how many toys he/she actually wants to keep. This is common knowledge that children normally do not play with more than 10 toys at a time. You might be hoarding a lot of toys because your child might play with it someday. But let me tell you, that day might never come. So it is a better idea to teach your child to choose carefully what she wants to keep. And let her donate the unwanted toys to some charitable organization. This act of choosing will make her aware of many things. First, she will know what she loves best, it is a rare knowledge. Most of us grow into confused adults as we never face such choices day in and day out. Our lives become overwhelmed with confusing options just like the heap of unwanted toys that we never decided to do away with. Children learn that there is limited room, as there is limited time in life. And it is important to choose the best and keep it, instead of hoarding all unwanted stuff which will hide the things that you really love.
Once the best-loved toys are selected, it becomes easier to get children to clean as picking a few toys from the floor is not a daunting task. Besides, children can be made aware that if they do not choose to pick up a toy, it will be considered that they don’t need it and the toy will be taken away. This is another level of awareness, where after a point in time the child will lose interest in a particular toy and will not choose to spent time on managing it. This also makes the toy storage area a constantly changing and exciting place, where the child will find only his favorite toys and not a heap of junk. These children, as they grow up, will be freer, more flexible and open in their approach towards life. They will not get stuck with any specific thing, person or experience. They will not spend their life trying to hoard things or money. They will be able to mindful clean all aspects of their lives.
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Ritucharya 